The Most Common Obstacle: The Voice Of Judgment

What’s the number one obstacle to opening and discovering the potential of your voice? The Voice of Judgment.  Often when someone is starting to sing again or they are just beginning on their voice journey, and they start to sing or sound, they hear a critical voice in their head. “What are you doing? What is that sound? You can’t sing. I don’t like that noise.” Sometimes I call it the voice of Shut Down. It usually has a mean or critical tone.  It’s the voice that says you’re not allowed to make weird sounds, gravelly sounds,  loud sounds, bird sounds, insect sounds, sacred Sanskrit sounds.  Society has taught us that there are only two ways we can use our voice. Words for communication in our mother tongue(or other languages if we learn them), and singing if we are one of the lucky few who can sing. 

The Voice of Shut Down

The voice of shut down has one goal—for you to stop making sound. It’s a voice of protection, internalized judgment from a parent, music teacher, or anyone else who stifled your expression when you were young. That voice wants to keep you safe from experiencing more hurt and pain. The voice of judgment comes in because you do not want to be vulnerable and be hurt again. But that does not mean you have to suffer under its tyranny now.

The Remedy

The remedy I recommend, and what I used in my own life at the beginning of my voice journey, is to create a protective bubble around yourself and your voice. Create a safe and sacred container for your voice practice in a way that feels good to you.   For me, I called myself a baby musician. Judgment had no place in this context.  I was a baby musician! I was learning! You don’t judge a baby….

    What this gave me was the freedom to explore, to try new things with my voice, to cultivate an attitude of loving acceptance. I embarked on a journey, having no idea what my voice could do, no idea about the sounds that were possible to make. And during this process, the voice of judgment was not that loud.  Relaxation is part of the key to opening the voice and discovering its treasures. And judgment is the opposite of relaxation! 

  Whenever we are learning something new or exploring something, we need the freedom to experiment and play, to sound awkward or weird or squeaky or gravelly. It is so important to cultivate a childlike innocence and wonder. When you are first making sound, you might need to let the pipes run a bit, to let some bits of detritus and dirt move out through the voice, letting the sound, the “water” run clean so to speak. Whenever we are learning something new, we need permission to make mistakes. The freedom to venture into the unknown. The freedom to be surprised.  The freedom to allow the process and allow the unfolding.

The Invitation

So I invite you to find a way to make your voice journey and practice a sacred space. A space of allowing and permission. A reclamation that a free voice is your birthright and one of your most powerful resources.   The more you approach your voice with this kind of loving acceptance, as you would a child, the more your voice will naturally open.

So I invite you to find a way to make your voice journey and practice a sacred space. A space of allowing and permission. A reclamation that a free voice is your birthright and one of your most powerful resources.

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Sing As If Your Life Depends On It

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What Birds Have To Teach Us About Singing